(I can NOT believe I pulled this off! One of my best writing accomplishments EVER.) Thank you, Dr. Seuss.
************
Inspired by a game I really enjoyed, I hope that my readers will not get annoyed
If I try to report this in the style of a rhyme, and hopefully convey that I had a good time.
The show started out the same way as before, with Ira Proctor doing stand-up some more.
He moved some of his jokes from beginning to end, and with a Dunkin Donuts rant made some new friends.
Brad and Colin finally came out on stage, evoking cheers and shouts from fans of every age.
Brad joked about the setting, how hot and muggy, and named it Mosquito Mountain, because it was buggy.
A shout from the audience asked, "Hey, where's Ryan?" despite the fact no one else was cryin.'
Brad answered back "Where's your wealthy cuter sister," and we all cheered because he'd really dissed her.
"Moving Bodies" started the show, with Sheri for Brad, and TR made Colin go.
In Denmark we were, and "their best accents"...NOT, in a CPA's office, oh the action they got.
The pair made the guys walk by hands on their butts, and Sheri even gestured around Colin's nuts.
Brad was "Queer Eye for the IRS Guy," and we were laughing so hard we were ready to cry.
"D.Copperfield and Starbucks all rolled into one," I can't explain better, but it sure was fun
To watch the whole place laugh in disbelief, by the time it was over we needed relief.
The next game they played is either Change or New Choice, and they pulled from the crowd a new little voice.
He came up on stage, Brad asked where he's from, he turned to the crowd and yelled, "Hi Mom!"
His said his name, Max, the guys knew they're in trouble, for that horn worked overtime, I'm sure it was double.
New choices galore, I couldn't keep up, and Max kept them going, he wouldn't let up!
To make this point clear, I've got written down, what Colin said when honked by this clown.
Since he'd just ended the 5th sentence in, his next response was, "Can I get a word IN??"
The scene was a car wash, but Max stole the scene, and when it was over, Colin was really keen
On grabbing the horn and honking it loud, as Brad brought him ALL THE WAY back to the crowd!
Colin told us the next game, involved a big duel, using a squirrel and tree stump as tools.
They played Dr. Seuss, who was born in Springfield, a useless shout that the "inane info bureau" revealed.
Our scene took place during interior design, "Wouldn't Brad's shirt covering the couch be divine?"
Brad preferred shiny instead, you knew it was coming, "shiny just like your head."
Colin got stuck for a moment, I guess, for a memorable line he repeated, yes
"Draperies draperies draperies, YAY! Draperies draperies draperies YAY!"
I remember Brad's squirrel attacking C's nuts, and Colin's tree stump not saving his butt.
They avoided the "F" word, it lightened the load, "That one's for you, Max, an element of class on the road."
They collected Sentences (rejecting those that were rude), with Colin's first sentence setting the mood.
"Did you enjoy my snack fairy ad?" "No, not the snacks, but the fairy!" said Brad.
Lots of amusing lines came very fast, I couldn't keep up with them to save my ass.
I do know that Max's name showed up again, but we were all laughing too hard by then.
Then there was Brad's rap, to a guy named Keith, and I'll use his rhyme, I kept hearing "neath."
Keith lived in Framingham, worked in Duxbury, and we corrected the drunkie, it's NOT "Deluxebury."
Brad did his rap, Colin did his bit, and it was 2lb of rap, and 10lb of spit.
Here is the message I'd gotten so far, "New Balance shoes and plaid shorts don't make a rap star."
For Sound Effects, they pulled up Kathryn for Brad, and Mike up for Colin, good sounds to be had.
I shouted "Death Valley" and that was taken, for Colin had asked for a place godforsaken.
The game started off, and our electricians worked, where some odd-sounding vultures lurked.
Kathryn made noises, with her own arms flappin,' but the sound effects eventually happened.
It got so hot out there, they needed a drink, so they tried to flag down an ice cream truck, I think
Brad grabbed a megaphone, "Popsicles!" he did say, but Colin said it didn't work, it was set on "gay"!
Brad flouncing around crying "Popsicles" again and again, I don't remember anything else before the end.
This was one of those games that you needed to see, to truly appreciate what so tickled me.
The last game was Mousetrap, and laid out as obstruction, were all these "Weapons of Mouse Destruction."
Barefoot and blindfolded, Colin and Brad, sentenced their digits to hell, it was BAD.
This game makes me cringe with every playing, and I don't understand why it keeps on staying.
But the crowd loved the game, loved the guys, loved the sight, so who'm I to quibble? It was a GREAT NIGHT!
If I try to report this in the style of a rhyme, and hopefully convey that I had a good time.
The show started out the same way as before, with Ira Proctor doing stand-up some more.
He moved some of his jokes from beginning to end, and with a Dunkin Donuts rant made some new friends.
Brad and Colin finally came out on stage, evoking cheers and shouts from fans of every age.
Brad joked about the setting, how hot and muggy, and named it Mosquito Mountain, because it was buggy.
A shout from the audience asked, "Hey, where's Ryan?" despite the fact no one else was cryin.'
Brad answered back "Where's your wealthy cuter sister," and we all cheered because he'd really dissed her.
"Moving Bodies" started the show, with Sheri for Brad, and TR made Colin go.
In Denmark we were, and "their best accents"...NOT, in a CPA's office, oh the action they got.
The pair made the guys walk by hands on their butts, and Sheri even gestured around Colin's nuts.
Brad was "Queer Eye for the IRS Guy," and we were laughing so hard we were ready to cry.
"D.Copperfield and Starbucks all rolled into one," I can't explain better, but it sure was fun
To watch the whole place laugh in disbelief, by the time it was over we needed relief.
The next game they played is either Change or New Choice, and they pulled from the crowd a new little voice.
He came up on stage, Brad asked where he's from, he turned to the crowd and yelled, "Hi Mom!"
His said his name, Max, the guys knew they're in trouble, for that horn worked overtime, I'm sure it was double.
New choices galore, I couldn't keep up, and Max kept them going, he wouldn't let up!
To make this point clear, I've got written down, what Colin said when honked by this clown.
Since he'd just ended the 5th sentence in, his next response was, "Can I get a word IN??"
The scene was a car wash, but Max stole the scene, and when it was over, Colin was really keen
On grabbing the horn and honking it loud, as Brad brought him ALL THE WAY back to the crowd!
Colin told us the next game, involved a big duel, using a squirrel and tree stump as tools.
They played Dr. Seuss, who was born in Springfield, a useless shout that the "inane info bureau" revealed.
Our scene took place during interior design, "Wouldn't Brad's shirt covering the couch be divine?"
Brad preferred shiny instead, you knew it was coming, "shiny just like your head."
Colin got stuck for a moment, I guess, for a memorable line he repeated, yes
"Draperies draperies draperies, YAY! Draperies draperies draperies YAY!"
I remember Brad's squirrel attacking C's nuts, and Colin's tree stump not saving his butt.
They avoided the "F" word, it lightened the load, "That one's for you, Max, an element of class on the road."
They collected Sentences (rejecting those that were rude), with Colin's first sentence setting the mood.
"Did you enjoy my snack fairy ad?" "No, not the snacks, but the fairy!" said Brad.
Lots of amusing lines came very fast, I couldn't keep up with them to save my ass.
I do know that Max's name showed up again, but we were all laughing too hard by then.
Then there was Brad's rap, to a guy named Keith, and I'll use his rhyme, I kept hearing "neath."
Keith lived in Framingham, worked in Duxbury, and we corrected the drunkie, it's NOT "Deluxebury."
Brad did his rap, Colin did his bit, and it was 2lb of rap, and 10lb of spit.
Here is the message I'd gotten so far, "New Balance shoes and plaid shorts don't make a rap star."
For Sound Effects, they pulled up Kathryn for Brad, and Mike up for Colin, good sounds to be had.
I shouted "Death Valley" and that was taken, for Colin had asked for a place godforsaken.
The game started off, and our electricians worked, where some odd-sounding vultures lurked.
Kathryn made noises, with her own arms flappin,' but the sound effects eventually happened.
It got so hot out there, they needed a drink, so they tried to flag down an ice cream truck, I think
Brad grabbed a megaphone, "Popsicles!" he did say, but Colin said it didn't work, it was set on "gay"!
Brad flouncing around crying "Popsicles" again and again, I don't remember anything else before the end.
This was one of those games that you needed to see, to truly appreciate what so tickled me.
The last game was Mousetrap, and laid out as obstruction, were all these "Weapons of Mouse Destruction."
Barefoot and blindfolded, Colin and Brad, sentenced their digits to hell, it was BAD.
This game makes me cringe with every playing, and I don't understand why it keeps on staying.
But the crowd loved the game, loved the guys, loved the sight, so who'm I to quibble? It was a GREAT NIGHT!
Good work, dahlin', I enjoyed it! :)
ReplyDeleteOh, and I had a question...had you written it like this in 2005, or did you change it around specifically for this blog?
ReplyDeleteThis is how I wrote it in 2005. All I did was cut and paste this one. One of the others didn't make sense to me at first, so I might have edited that, but this one's in its original form.
ReplyDeleteJust checking in and catching up. Loved this!! Well done and bravo! As for the "fuck up", let youreelf off the hook. You work too hard to also beat yourself up. Sending loooooove. xoxo Barbara
ReplyDeletePS my captcha word for the last comment was "Newnshat". Made me giggle.
ReplyDeleteBarb, thank you so much for your support. That long warm hug was exactly the kind I needed. There's no way to explain how deep in the hole it feels I am at times, but the light you offered was a relief, a reminder that at least a way exists, even if I can't reach it at the moment. Before treatment, and occasionally since, I never believed there was a way out, so this is huge. THANK YOU.
ReplyDeleteMany hugs,
Dawn